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Birth supplants death.

Our tears of sorrows, condemned, become laughter of joy.

Congrats, Kasey & Neemath on the new birth (Valentina):


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Valentine is here once again with the atmosphere festooned in red and labelled with an irresistible attraction of fun. For the hedonistic, which I myself couldn’t claim a neuter, it would be a time to check out the most resplendent of bars, where magnificent foods and wine are served and where the atmosphere is rife with histrionic blues to drive home our points to that special girl, who had our minds riveted on “forever-after stories” for far too long.

While these roses, chocolate bars, teddy bears, cards and frames fly without wings and nestle in the comfy of those we share these feelings and thoughts toward, I extricate myself from the purview of norms and break the barrier of tradition to effect the real value of what this celebration has on me.

How do we celebrate love?

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Is valentine day the real day set apart to celebrate love or lovers? If the latter question is answered in the affirmative,then should love be a timeline or date-bound virtue espoused? Should a special day be set distinctive to express the uncommon? Well, I opined, love should not be celebrated everyday, rather, it should be, every seconds that we breathe. Giving the constraints of the present world, where we all move in relative oblivion to the little thread that holds man’s very existence and since the fabric of this neo-world is eaten by the chase for the unreal, it would be expedient if we all agreed to set a day apart to celebrate that which naturally should be celebrated every living second.

Being my liberal self, I am less critical about how others spend this valentine. I need no Alaadin mind to discern,most would be clad in red and white with red flowers everywhere, cuddling, holding hands, snuggling, kissing, coupling and traversing one gourmet hall to another and retiring to a sumptuous rumbling in the silence of their homes, and the love-day is done ? !   Nay! I, for one, took a time out from the trappings of self, which is the lone barrier to real love, to embrace a virtue which others find uncommon, which I relish as the ultimate reality love.

I will spare thought for Mama Mary, who lost her husband to the mayhem that embroiled Kaduna recently. I have watched with helpless resignation ever since she returned to Lagos with four kids she had to take care of all alone. It’s now time to show fellowship with this woman and let her feel loved in this lonely world. A meagre sum to help with food stuffs and my valentine box of chocolate for the kids will send the right love message.

I will take a few minutes to check on inmates in kirikiri, having been in the solitude of my thoughts for far too long, I realised what it is like to spend a day behind bars with all liberty agonisingly revamped to the hands of the jailer. Some of my used, though clean clothes, provisions, the holy books for them might strike compassionate appeal and a fortuitous message that life still awaits them in the world outside. Shouldn’t forget to take a copy of “the man died “, for Alikama, an undergraduate student unionist of one of the most volatile universities in Nigeria. His story is particularly striking as he was among the numerous protesters arrested during the OccupyNaija protest and since then, he has not been properly sued to court or granted bail. That book might help him understand he’s not in the struggle alone. Hmmn,what better love can Valentine bring for him?

On my way, I will pause and take a deep breath at Ekundayo: the home for homeless, orphans and special children. Little wraps of everyday needs distributed might not last much, but would be enough to bring smiles on their faces and illuminate their doldrums. Though fagged out, I will trudge along in valentine’s day’s final triumph and pause at “Club One Touch” to see those wayward daughters of Eve, the ladies of easy virtues. Will not forget to enlighten them about the ills of STDs, VDs and the need for protection. Will distribute condoms, inspiration tracts, pills and toiletries. A special rose for Onome, who though finding herself in this despicable act still manages to write a book for school children.

And when it’s all done, though exhausted from the labour of the day, night will bring to my heart the true value of love and valour as my message is not lost to those who really deserve our love feast; the oppressed of the society.


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That which is taken as the communion of lovers is what I find very unrealistic and idealistic in this world of form, most especially if perceived through the socio-political realities around the world. Love is one of the most problematised concepts in human history as it is even incapable of any ultimate definition. Love has stumbled in the streets, it has perished; it has vanished from the senses of all, it is no wђεяε to be found. However, even if we must celebrate that “love” which is nonrepresentational, let us all use it to reflect momentarily on those who have paid the painful price of love with their lives to make this world still inhabitable in spite of all the calamities around and as we do that, we equally build a sense of belonging for others who have no feeling of love at all.


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  1. hahahahahahahaha!!!! whew, what a relief, finally a true definition of what valentine truly is, jeez i wish people would read this and finally understand the definition of love vs Feb 14th, especially we 21st century ladies…It’s like Easter, where most Christians remember the sufferings and death of Christ once in a year only, sorry, lol. Nice write up by the way, thumbs up!!

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