Category Archives: Happenin’

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#PAUSIBILITY: MR PRESIDENT, IN LOCO PARENTIS by Adebayo Coker

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Malal14th July, 2013, I sat right in front of my television set, and watched as a young sixteen year old girl delivered one of the most courageous speeches I ever listened to, during a United Nations General Assembly. Each word she uttered on that international podium gyrated with bravery. I rose in ovation at the end of her delivery as I do not think any world leader could have been more inspiring than Malala Yousafzai. (I love that girl).

The UN declared 14th July of every year #MalalaDay.

This superlative young girl defied the bullets of discouragement Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: MR PRESIDENT, IN LOCO PARENTIS by Adebayo Coker →

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NIGERIA: THE NATION OF HYPOCRITES by Ikoro Iyineleda

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homFor you are like whitewashed tombs which indeed appear beautiful outwardly, but inside are full of dead men’s bones and all uncleanness. Even so you also outwardly appear righteous to men, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness.

– Jesus, The Christ.

Nigeria is said to be a very religious country. According to a 2003 report, which is recorded in Wikipedia, 50.4 % of Nigeria’s population are Muslims, while 48.2 % are Christians, and 1.4 % adhere to other religions. Which is another way of saying that practically all Nigerians believe in one religion or the other. Almost everywhere in the Southern part of the country can be seen churches and other such Christian gatherings. While, in the North, blood is constantly shed in The Name of God. Thus giving the impression that Nigeria is a country of citizens who live a life of total commitment to The Almighty. Yet, like The Christ has said, “Even so you also outwardly appear righteous to men, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness.”

Thus you see the hypocritical and lawless Nigerians trying to dictate morals to the West. “No,” it says to Western leaders. “We cannot accept your homosexuality. We cannot accept your perversion.” Then it concludes its moralizing with threats of a very heavy jail term for those unfortunate enough to be caught practising homosexuality in the country. A conclusion that was applauded by most of its citizens; who placed editorials in the Press, letters to editors of newspapers and magazines, essays and articles, and other such opinions, all in the mass media; all expressing their approval of the motion and their denunciation of Western perversion. Continue reading NIGERIA: THE NATION OF HYPOCRITES by Ikoro Iyineleda →

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THE MASK BY Ikoro Iyineleda

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maskkOne that has nothing to hide will not strive to conceal it. Thus the reason behind the cosmetics, the make-up, the dress sense that the average woman ever strives to have – to that extent where she even would it be imposed on the average man, which he then usually ignores. For the fact it is that the woman has a whole lot much more to hide in terms of that lack of beauty that she thereby strives to conceal, than the man that cares not how he looks. And it is that same fact that has women ever strive to conceal the passion for pleasure that would the man believe she cares not for sex; and that has the man, not being driven by the same intensity of passion, bother not about hiding his own – less intense – passion for that same sex. And, not only because of that part of human nature that believes all men (and women) are inherently the same, but also because the man rarely ever strives to conceal his passion – for he has not as much to conceal as the woman does; all a man has to do is spend a second’s attention on a woman, and she will instantly conclude that he is also burning with the passion that ever sears her flesh – and, at that moment, would his be doused by hers.

Continue reading THE MASK BY Ikoro Iyineleda →

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A MESSAGE TO TOLANI AJAYI, THE RCCG FATHER-KILLER by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi

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Tolani-SAN-300x224Tolani Ajayi is a name recently tossed in the news, I dare say, probably for the wrong reason. I’ve heard that name too. I’ve said ‘probably’ because I don’t assume the stance of the average public, who wouldn’t waste time to condemn the criminal act you, a 21-year old 300 Level undergraduate of History and International Relations at the Redeemer’s University, Redemption Camp along Lagos/Ibadan expressway, have committed. It was reported that you stabbed your father, Charles Ajayi, who happened to be a preacher and Senior Advocate of Nigeria before his death.

In retrospect, you have your mother and sibling to apologize to, saying anger made you kill your father and that you regretted your action. You also said in spite of your history of using drug (no tag), you were not under the influence of any such thing when the incident happened. However, trust Nigerians, it is most Continue reading A MESSAGE TO TOLANI AJAYI, THE RCCG FATHER-KILLER by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi →

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#PAUSIBILITY: NIGERIAN ARMY THROUGH THOMAS HOBBES’ EYES by Adebayo Coker

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hobbesdLast week Friday, the 4th of July, 2014, Lagos, The Centre of Excellence, and one of the foremost cosmopolitan cities in the world, was thrown into pandemonium by some soldiers of the Nigerian Army. Few hours later, the official  statement, as is typical of reports of an official carnage like this, came from the Defence Headquarters  vide the lips of the Minister of State for Defence , that the ‘situation’ was taken advantage of by some urchins (take note of my inverted commas). I said to myself “that complied with the advancement of state complicity in lawlessness, as is typical of the situation that birthed ‘Unknown Soldiers’ in the 70s”.

I wish Thomas Hobbes had lived till date and beheld the present day Lagos, I am sure he would not have thought that anyone, regardless of the level of his/her crudeness, would yield to brutishness in dealing with issues of civil infraction. Let me put it rightly, not even a goat would love to deface this modern city that all Nigerians are proud of (how much more a rational being in relation to state properties?). But Hobbes would have been more disappointed (I am as disappointed) that the set of people he had thought would safeguard the Commonwealth as he had Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: NIGERIAN ARMY THROUGH THOMAS HOBBES’ EYES by Adebayo Coker →

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DEAR STRANGER, a love letter by Adejuwon Grace Oluwawemimo

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strange                       I know this much about you; that you are human just like I am. That we have never met is true but knowing with all certainty that you are out there makes me feel like there is a companion going through life with me. I address this letter to you because, in a way, we are the same – life-fellows with questions that linger deep within our hearts with a tenacity that defies evasion. Questions pertinent about what the next step in our drifting existence ought to be; questions ceaselessly demanding from us what to life our attitude should be. Stranger though you are, yet a companion so dear.

I know very well there are moments you are reduced to sighs and gasps, because such moments exist for me, too. That you have many times grieved and mourned I have no doubt, for that, again, is a necessary life-fare that guarantees our companionship. Continue reading DEAR STRANGER, a love letter by Adejuwon Grace Oluwawemimo →

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#PAUSIBILITY: OH MY THUMB, SAVE MY LIFE by Adebayo Coker

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fayoseeeThe efficacy of prayer is indubitable; from sects, religions, creeds. I once heard a particular atheist say to me after a show of kindness “God bless you”, that was a form of prayer. In one way or the other we say words of prayers in impressionable ways that we as individuals do not even recognize. In fact, we are admonished to pray all manners of prayers. Also, there is what is known as importunity in prayer.

“All my enemies fall down and die” is a common prayer request in the land lately. As I got the reassurance that all my household enemies have fallen down and died, I am faced with a greater challenge to overcome my immediate political and social menaces, principal of which are these ‘rulers of darkness in high places’. I am sure we are getting wiser now, that the almighty God will never come down to topple or change any government, but He will pour His fathomless grace on human beings and make them realize that they need a change. Let me reiterate here, God has given us all indications in Nigeria that we need and deserve a change. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: OH MY THUMB, SAVE MY LIFE by Adebayo Coker →

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CHIBOK: WHEN TEARS NO LONGER AVAIL by Adejuwon Grace Oluwawemimo

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chibo“If the creator had a purpose in equipping us with a neck, he surely meant us to stick it out.” – Arthur Koestler (1905 – 1983)

Someday, the little mama and dada’s girls will be a shadow of what they used to be. Their once fragile heart becoming as hardened as diamond and their trauma-tested wills mounting into an Continue reading CHIBOK: WHEN TEARS NO LONGER AVAIL by Adejuwon Grace Oluwawemimo →

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As Nigerian Doctors go to rest by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi

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Today, the Nigeria Medical Association commenced her indefinite strike action. It is habitual for the Federal Government of Nigeria to frustrate and pushdownload (10) until an affected trade union, capable of it though, goes for the jugular of the Government. That way, you’ll be prudently stocking up more funds for exigency situations rather than spend on all institutions of Government. No wonder a Minister, supported by other appointed members of Government, once said, during the six-month strike embarked upon by the Academic Staff Union of Nigeria Universities (ASUU), “The Government Continue reading As Nigerian Doctors go to rest by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi →

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#PAUSIBILITY: BEASTSIE BILLIONAIRE by Adebayo Coker

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serviccLet me start this essay by issuing two congratulatory notes.
The first note goes to Mr Ayodele Peter Fayose, the Governor-Elect of Ekiti State. Some of us will have to desist from calling Fayose a conman; otherwise he may sue for libel/slander, especially with the mighty federal might that he enjoys. If Ekiti people see something different from what we outsiders see, we should not suffer greater bereavement than the primary constituents. I wish you more success.
The second note goes to Mr President for his quick recovery that allows him gulp down some champagne at the announcement of the victory of Fayose. Nigerians should appreciate Mr. President; he has been going through a lot lately. Remember he lost his appetite and only sleeps with one eye since April 14, the day those girls were abducted in Chibok. Some will say he is being partisan by not congratulating HRM SLS and the people of Kano on the emergence of the former as the Emir of Kano, well, what I can say is that he has the discretion to choose who to pop champagne with. You know he expressed his happiness that bombings and abductions are not happening in PDP-led states? Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: BEASTSIE BILLIONAIRE by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: OLD NEWS, IN FELA’S VOICE by Adebayo Coker

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changeBefore we proceed on this journey, ‘let us get now into another underground spiritual game’ by allowing the song of that supernal being, Olufela Anikulapo-Kuti, to play on our minds’ stereos, where he said “nothing new sef to talk about… na old news be dat”. This is very important so that we can get the full grasp of what will follow from here.

I always tell people that nothing this crop of politicians do will catch me unawares. The only surprise they will spring is when they act differently from how they are acting presently. In my inaugural submission in this column, #PAUSIBILITY: LET’S GET OUR ACTS RIGHT, I put it straight that these politicians are simply employing different tactics, even the death of the populace, as pawns in their political chess games, just as Pastor Tunde Bakare described in one of his sermons. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: OLD NEWS, IN FELA’S VOICE by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: THE WITCH CRIED, THE CHILD DIED by Adebayo Coker

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witchh“How can there be anything which has no cause?”- Philebus.

My dear country is fast being plunged southward by these libertinage politicians that we have, but my major pain is that most of us have decided to just watch as these debauchees take us for a ride. There is nothing much we can do at this time but being steady and stalwart. We all must do what we must do to change the situations that we don’t like.  Our cumulative efforts will yield expected results and we will live as the good human beings that we are only if we will stop these crabbers.

Allow me quote extensively from the book of my good friend, Ayo Dada, The Sage:

A uniformed man, who was hastening towards his point of call, mindlessly shoved aside the devotee…

Scared at the sight of the brute, the devotee gave way and bitterly hurled at the fleeing man:

“Karma will get the better part of you!” Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: THE WITCH CRIED, THE CHILD DIED by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: CONVERSATION WITH BENJAMIN, A LAGOS DANFO DRIVER by Adebayo Coker

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danfoFew weeks ago, I went with a friend to carry out some maintenance works on his car. We left Willoughby Street, Oyingbo, Lagos, late in the evening and in order not to aggravate the fatigue of the day with the road rage that is most likely to happen on a typical Lagos road, we decided to cool off at one of the bars in the National Stadium (pity that is what this national monument has become). After cooling off (I won’t mention my brand so that Okupe through his retinue of assassins will not poison me), we hit the road. Just at the exit of the stadium, we heard a funny sound in the engine compartment of the car, and when we checked, we confirmed that the fan belt that was bought few hours ago had given way (Standard Organization of Nigeria is obviously sleeping). Perplexed, the fatigue increased even though the traffic on the road had cleared.

My friend decided to sleep at his friend’s place in Surulere to ease his taking the car back to Oyingbo the next day while I HAD TO GO HOME to my wife and son that night. The cab man saw a kill but I have always been a Lagos boy. Even though it‘s been a very long time that I used public transport last, I still can find my way round Lagos without my car, even at the oddest Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: CONVERSATION WITH BENJAMIN, A LAGOS DANFO DRIVER by Adebayo Coker →

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 #PAUSIBILITY: YOUR MONEY OR YOUR LIFE? by Adebayo Coker

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jobsMy fellow brothers and sisters in the labour market,

I hope you are doing fine despite the not too hopeful situation of our beloved nation? You wonder why I used the word, ‘fellow’?  Well, I am unemployed just as so many other people but I am never jobless as I have kept my mind busy working on ideas that I have long had in mind, one of which is being a columnist. I have two books to my credit: SOCIETAL FRAGMENTS and A MAN LIKE ME, both available on www.amazon.com. The truth is, writing is far more fulfilling for me though not financially rewarding, especially with the reading culture around here. But all the same I will not allow this dream of mine to wither or be stolen from me regardless of the dearth of hope that abounds. I will push on through till the world recognizes this light of mine.

I have to start on that note so that I’ll let you know that I share your pains. I feel the weight and bear the burden. At the moment, nothing seems to be working, but our world will be changed through our strong determination to achieve our goals. We have Continue reading  #PAUSIBILITY: YOUR MONEY OR YOUR LIFE? by Adebayo Coker →

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“NOW THAT BOTHA MUST BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY” by Yemi Czar

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bothaI write this piece to quickly draw our critical consciousness to this “infamous”, yet significant, speech of P.W Botha, the erstwhile President of the apartheid South Africa, which a friend drew my attention to in the course of the week (even in the overwhelming ambiance of my grudges against Nigerian leaders, but gratifying reluctance in discussing them), after reading one of his email’s entitled “Now That Botha Must Be Taken Seriously (or whatever that means)!”. For the sake of emphasis, I decided to retain the title.

The reason for bringing up this speech anyway is to enable us have a rethink of the horrifying events that have plagued our nation Nigeria, and by extension Africa – corruption, civil unrests and wars, leadership crisis, kidnappings here and there, consumerism and underdevelopment, and more recently, terrorism – since independence. These horrible events, we must recall, have for a while now been attracting blatant reactions from sensitive and oversensitive people to an extent that even the silence of phlegmatic individuals has become the din that prevents us from hearing ourselves anymore. Therefore, at this critical time, existential questions demand immediate answers as they continue to gaze at us shamefully and a need for us as Blacks to reconsider Botha’s chauvinistic and supposed malign speech. This speech, of course, seems the only formula that couched, thoroughly and fittingly, our rhetoric of confusion, most especially at this moment when our entire socio-political realities continue to draw hoots of derision and despair from us, thus, making us all becoming improvised, nay, accidental social critics of Continue reading “NOW THAT BOTHA MUST BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY” by Yemi Czar →

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#PAUSIBILITY: RECLAIMING CHIBOK by Adebayo Coker

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BringBackOurGirls_truck

By principle, a man that cannot protect his neighbor is himself in a big security mess.

When GEJ ordered Eagle One to Paris rather than Chibok, he was not doing the unstated; he already hinted during his last media chat that Shekau and his boys will kill anyone that ventures Sambisa. I must doff my hat for the men and women that are still living in that village of terror, Chibok; they are stronger than this CinC with all of his appurtenances of military might combined with the strength of the international allies. Even when GEJ had the opportunity to get grasp of the situation by granting just few minutes’ audience to the protesters of #BringBackOurGirls in Abuja yesterday which could have placed him on a better pedestal with the people, he blew it. Those of you that think you are helping this guy, there is God o! Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: RECLAIMING CHIBOK by Adebayo Coker →

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#Boko Haram, all Nigerians are as good as dead

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bokofWith the indiscriminate ‘butchery’ of Nigerians by the dreaded and attention-seeking Boko Haram, all Nigerians are as good as dead. And one wonders if by Nigeria, we are referring to a country and not a mere geographical tag of a space, where anyone is at liberty to do anything in the name of whatever goddamn thing they believe in. No one knows when he or she may be the next victim of their senseless killings until it has happened; unfortunately, dead persons know nothing of such, I suppose. However, there are some victims who are given the privilege of being injured and that’s if their situations are not worse than being dead.

Is this a country? Whatever the response may be, should it remain so? In the last few years and at every turn, thousands of Nigerian humans with full constitutional rights, not fishes or insects, have been ignobly murdered. Shortly before their deaths, they all must have believed strongly in the supremacy of the constitution of the Federa Continue reading #Boko Haram, all Nigerians are as good as dead →

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Re: FFK, the prostitution of a statesman, by Seni Akinrinade

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ffk

It was with mixed feelings that I received the news that Chief Femi Fani-Kayode, FFK may have decamped from the main opposition All Progressives Congress APC to the ruling People’s Democratic Party PDP. As in, JUST LIKE THAT!!!!!!!

Well I described my initial reaction as “mixed” because even though FFK has recently gained a huge followership (or readership, if you mind) on social media due to his open criticisms of the anti-people policies of the current GEJ-led federal government, his antecedents as the mouthpiece (attack dog) of the not-so-popular Obasanjo-led FG remain fresh in my memory. It got so bad that the then presidential spokesman would spit fire plus venom on anybody (I mean anybody) who dared to disagree with the president on any matter then. OBJ just could not go wrong in FFK’s diary then, the same way GEJ cannot be wrong in Dr Reuben Abati’s opinion nowadays.

 

Well, FFK was later rewarded with ministerial positions but that pathway would not form part of this article. I think this short introduction was necessary just to remind us that FFK has always had the tendency to “defend” his source of livelihood and it Continue reading Re: FFK, the prostitution of a statesman, by Seni Akinrinade →

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Re: Omojuwa & other arrested Nigerian protesters. Can we chat? by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi

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omoju

It was an evening not anywhere surreal. As usual, everyone went about their daily tasks rather differently; some peacefully, others riotously, irritably, miserably, grumpily or some like billy-o. However, for some of us who were privileged, to say the best, or disadvantaged, to say the obvious, to be members of the academia, we were cocooned within an office space that was dimly lit, ventilated by a small slit called a window. As we sat, marking time, a song that waltzed itself straight to my spine was Fela Anikulapo’s “Suffering and Smiling”. I wondered why but wasn’t it rather apparent?

 

Here in Nigeria, at a time when young Nigerians should be brazenly outspoken at demanding the respect of their long-trodden rights, everyone seems to be sated by the crumbs that fall off “God knows where”. No one talks, no one agitates, no one cares about their trampled rights; everyone simply grumbles and submits “Why should I be the one to lead?” There’s a Yoruba wise-saying thatomo Continue reading Re: Omojuwa & other arrested Nigerian protesters. Can we chat? by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi →

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FATHERHOOD a short fiction by Olakunle Sanusi

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fatherhood

I became a father one dusty, quiet harmattan morning precisely on February 17th 1998. I was going on thirty, and as my wife was led into the labor room I felt a surge of inexplicable pride, little did I know the events that would unfold; that I would experience a turnaround in my spiritual existence never occurred to me.

Nothing had prepared me for the admixture of trauma and joy I experienced that morning. Felicia never complained about any excessive abdominal pain nor was there any warning from the doctor that the birth would be difficult. I was awakened around 3:00 am in the morning by the sounds of Felicia groaning and holding her lower Continue reading FATHERHOOD a short fiction by Olakunle Sanusi →