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#Pausibility: Asceticism vs Epicureanism by Adebayo Coker

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austerityEarlier this week, our polymath Prime Minister, who had on many occasions ‘rebased ‘our minds that our  economy is standing gidigba, finally announced that we should expect  some measure of imposition on our ‘normal’ life as a nation.

I can’t imagine a Nigeria where a minister can’t ride a three-million-dollar car; a Nigeria where a Director in a government parastatal  can’t own properties estimated at billions of naira; a Nigeria where gross ingratiation at the expense of the masses and massive corruption can’t be attenuated to mere pilfering… that will be an abnormal Nigeria.

They brazen- show feigned statistics that are far from the realities of the living conditions of the masses. God knows how they come about those figures. How can an outsider tell you the interior of your house better than you know it yourself? The fish in my pot I know so well. So I need no Fitch to tell me what I know. Victoria’s secret is in public glare. Continue reading #Pausibility: Asceticism vs Epicureanism by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: OF NOMINAL, NORMAL AND THE EXTREME by Adebayo Coker

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Adebayo Coker on Rubbin' Minds
Adebayo Coker on Rubbin’ Minds

Just as the common example, Ramadan has come to an end and a sharp upsurge in the patronage of brothels and beer parlors noticeable. Do not get me wrong, same could be said of quadragesimal period. A great number of us display piety louder than the Pope and the chiefest of Sheikhs just around those periods that we observe our religious abstinence, but other than those times, we are just as evil as the devil can be.

Yours truly was Ebuka’s guest at Channels TV last Sunday. It was a live cast of the famous programme for youths, Rubbin’Minds (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJmy8Q_xx2Q), Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: OF NOMINAL, NORMAL AND THE EXTREME by Adebayo Coker →

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AGAINST NATURE? NO WONDER WE’RE NOT GROWING…

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Here is a post published fifteen days short of a year ago. It’s believed to be quite relevant at this time. Please, have fun.

lakunlescrews's avatarlAkUnLeScReWs

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“Appreciating the beauty of a blossom, the loveliness of a lilac, or the grace of a gazelle are all ways in which people can, in some small measure, fill their daily lives with evolutionarily inspired epiphanies of pleasure.”
– Buss, 2000, p. 22 READ MORE

Just like every other Nigerian (know it or not), I am proud and terribly ashamed of the tag Nigerian. Not at the same time though, but independently. I am proud and the main reason (the only one, if you mind) would be that I was born Nigerian, in Nigeria and have never stepped out of Nigeria (except in my dreams, of course).

I am ashamed because in spite of the opportunities God (or whoever/whatever you think is our benefactor in this regard) has given my nation to be a great country (you may want to disregard the fact that we have once been great as independent, sovereign nations…

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#PAUSIBILITY: Your Daily Bomb-o-scope, Don’t Go Out Without It by Adebayo Coker

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shekauThe life of a Nigerian is not worth more than a pawn on a chess board; that is to say, nothing is too big for the Nigerian politician to sacrifice: as long as it is not his/her ambition, he/she is okay by it. Nigeria is going down, locally and internationally. There is no denying it. We need help.

The blood-esurient Shekau showed up in a movie again last weekend, even after he was touted to have been killed many times during different military bombardments and raids of his hideouts; the Nigerian government has made this guy ‘a cat with nine lives’ exemplar. True to what he was quoted to have said in the video on Yahoo News, my heart grieved. My heart grieved because on two different occasions have I woken up from a nightmare that my beloved Nigeria is being overtaken by terrorists. The thought of being ruled by some sickened individuals makes me sick. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: Your Daily Bomb-o-scope, Don’t Go Out Without It by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: EXCUSE ME! THIS IS A SECULAR STATE by Adebayo Coker

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Fashola-360x225My good friend and brother, Jeff Underwood asked me earlier in the week if I’m considering posting any other thing on my blog apart from politics. It’s a good question as I have asked myself the same over and again; in fact, I attempted being apolitical on my blog sometime back but to tell you the truth, there is no way one would demand change in this clime without being political, a passivist or Dokubo-like, especially with the rodents that parade themselves as leaders because people with good brains lack the will to offer themselves for service. We must start considering our stance. Enough said.

The Government of the Federation or of a State shall not adopt any religion as State Religion.

Section 10 of the 1999 Constitution of The Federal Republic of Nigeria.

The motto of the Federal Republic of Nigeria shall be Unity and Faith, Peace and Progress. Accordingly, national integration shall be actively encouraged, whilst discrimination on the grounds of place of origin, sex, religion, status, ethnic or linguistic association or ties shall be prohibited. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: EXCUSE ME! THIS IS A SECULAR STATE by Adebayo Coker →

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WOBBLED WORDS: A BOOK FOR CHARITY. SHOW LOVE, BUY A COPY by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi

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Wobbled Words
Wobbled Words

Nigerians are not all about money. Many times, we sacrifice

This past weekend, some Nigerian writers including Bode Asiyanbi, a two-time winner of the BBC African Performance Playwriting Prize, who has also worked with the BBC World Service Trust as a writer on its groundbreaking radio and television drama series, Story Story and Wetin Dey and Adebayo Coker, the author of Societal Fragments and A Man Like Me: Noteography Of a Father to His Son and a host of others, published a book of collected short stories with a singular aim of charity.

This is just one of the many good examples that may go a step further towards helping in nation-building. Enough of the talks; let’s put in more action.

To purchase the book, you need just a little detail.

Title:    WOBBLED WORDS

Platform to purchase:    Amazon

Cost: Affordable, depending on format (Just check it out).

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#PAUSIBILITY: ARMITICE WITH AN EYE CYST? by Adebayo Coker

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bokoOne of the news items, in fact, it was reeled as a Breaking News item, last weekend was the Ceasefire Deal that was entered into by the FGN with Boko Haram. I am sure so many of us will say it is a welcome development; but immediately I saw that piece on Channels TV I knew this is another of those displays of mental incapacity to think right and to act right by the crop of managers in charge of our state affairs.

I am sure many of us must have been reading different analyses and commentaries on why this particular ceasefire is defective. I have my wholesome reservations too about the deal but I will only employ Maieutics to drive home my point. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: ARMITICE WITH AN EYE CYST? by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: EKITI, A GLIMPSE OF MORE KITI KITI TO COME by Adebayo Coker

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Fayose-and-FayemiI am one of those that never abused or cursed the people of Ekiti on the choice of the Governor they elected in the last gubernatorial election of the state. In fact, I stopped talking about Ekiti politics the moment the result of the said gubernatorial election was announced; I even congratulated and wished the Governor-elect God’s guidance in his new ‘adventure’. But never for once in my private discussions with my Ekiti friends (I have them handful) did I stop letting them know that though JKF lacks the kind of ‘were-lafi-nsoko-were’ kind of skill to survive our typical Nigerian political terrain, it is a grave mistake on the part of the Ekiti electorate to have elected that lairy young man as their Governor. This is the first time I am coming public Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: EKITI, A GLIMPSE OF MORE KITI KITI TO COME by Adebayo Coker →

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PROF. ‘BAYO LAMIKANRA: BECOMING A CHILD AGAIN by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi

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lamikaHaving lived for sixty five years, one is expected to have shrunk in stature and many times in status as one begins a drastic journey down the slope one had gone up earlier. To many, it’s a time they do not appreciate in many ramifications. However, for the only Lamikay I know, Professor Adebayo Lamikanra as he’s known in official circles, it’s the best moment of his life. Well, I would not be certain of that because I can predict the cynical reaction of the birthday boy if he read me say that, “was that a day at all?” accompanied with a chuckle and his characteristic facial expression, which I always interpreted as wordlessly saying ‘balderdash’. Well, I admit I must have made two wrong assumptions, balderdash as they were: one, that his 65th birthday was the best moment of his life and two, predicting, wrongly Continue reading PROF. ‘BAYO LAMIKANRA: BECOMING A CHILD AGAIN by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi →

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GEJ: THIS PASTOR NEEDS A PRIVATE JET by Monsieur Mobutu

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PRIVATE-JETS-IN-NIGERIA‘”Go ye therefore into the world and teach my gospel,” that kinda thing was what the Lord told us and the disciples. Going to all corners of the world, you’ll agree with me sir, has become difficult without a private jet especially for us Pastors. That is the reason I’m addressing this love letter to you (note sir, not to your office as President of the country sir).

Please, kindly disregard the advent and roles played by the ubiquitous social media in connecting anyone with the rest of the world from the recesses of his/her room. In fact, the social media rather extends the reach of Pastors, hence more work need to be done. In the fulfillment of our mandate as Pastors, there’s the need to get physical (You know what I mean not sensually and if your thought is sensual, then you may need my pastoral intervention) with the members of the globe who might have been ‘blessed’ by our messages on the social media or cable televisions across board. Continue reading GEJ: THIS PASTOR NEEDS A PRIVATE JET by Monsieur Mobutu →

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#PAUSIBILITY: PROLIFERATION OF NONSENSE by Adebayo Coker

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I have not been too frequent on social media lately as I have been going through a self- prescribed curative therapy, aimed at purging myself of ‘textiety’, as I was fondly glued to the internet mainly through my phones; but here I am well drowned in a deluge of messages that have flooded my handles, some of which are soliciting my opinion on some national issues; but before I settle down to that, let me digress a bit.

I had thought it is only in Nollywood that we witness watery rushes of a lazy coloration of our common sense, until last weekend when I came in contact with a certain man, whose introduction threw me into crestfallenness, followed by resounding laughter. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: PROLIFERATION OF NONSENSE by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: PARABLE OF THE CRUCIFIX by Adebayo Coker

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crucifixDear compatriots, let me wish you a Happy Independence Anniversary all the same, even though I have never had a more watery Independence Anniversary celebration in my existence as a Nigerian. I would not want to be disinterested in this nation and her politics, as I have come to find out that that is exactly the goal of these political louts that call themselves Nigerian politicians. They are perpetuating a psychological disenfranchisement where the enlightened ones amongst us will develop apathy to politics due to the mishandling of the nation and eventually leave the country, so that the politicians will have a leeway to act indiscriminately without any check. But I have promised myself not to dance to their evil drumbeats, and I urge you to join me by registering, participating, and voting right in the next elections, not forgetting to protect your votes. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: PARABLE OF THE CRUCIFIX by Adebayo Coker →

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DEAR NIGERIANS, IT IS TIME TO ACT by Yemi Czar

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Nigeria-RevolutionIt is with much sadness, I believe, that we have, together, watched our country inexorably degenerate into a total fiasco in the over 60 years of its independence. What is more painful and disheartening is the fact that our crops of politicians are those who have not learnt any notable lessons from the country’s past or the current events around the world nor get moved by the tears and agonies of the oppressed Nigerian souls who constitute the majority of the entire Nigerian population. Perhaps, they either don’t read what the papers and social media reveal each day about their misconducts (I want to believe) or they read them aloof while we read a posteriori, or they are just too busy looting every aspect of our economy with the very worst form of predilection for pilfering that they’ve become so deaf to and unmoved by the cries of the oppressed, and thus fail to call to mind the realities of history and current times. Continue reading DEAR NIGERIANS, IT IS TIME TO ACT by Yemi Czar →

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LADIES: WHERE THE POWER LIES by Monsieur Mobutu

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pottates

The place of women is in the kitchen.

The world is confused. While the men have become weaklings, many content with waking up to bottles of drinks; the women have realized that there’s a power beyond them, or that has been hidden from them for so long, and they are doing all they can to reach for it. Everytime and everywhere, you hear about women emancipation, gender equity and in fact ‘women first’. However, when a snake appears, the men must go first.

When the robbers bang at the door, the men must take the lead. And foolishly, many men would always say ‘YES’ to whatever the women say, however confused they may perpetually be even at their own detriment.

Continue reading LADIES: WHERE THE POWER LIES by Monsieur Mobutu →

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#PAUSIBILITY: WE ALL ARE CRAZY by Adebayo Coker

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lastma bribe lagosI had thought to relax my nerves for this week, especially when it is ominous if I don’t.

Still in shock after the auto crash that almost took my life on Wednesday night. At about 9pm, right in front of the Women Development Centre (WDC), along Oba Ogunji road, Agege Lagos , a Keke NAPEP tricyclist rode against the traffic and gave me a hard head butt. The car crashed and I sustained a cut on my toe, but I thank God for life.

Yesterday, I boarded a tricycle to Fagba as that is the closest point I could get to use the ATM, the mod con that emits money anytime of the day (if its operations have not gone on frenzy). One would have thought that in a  bid to Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: WE ALL ARE CRAZY by Adebayo Coker →

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WHEN VIRTUE SPEAKS BEAUTY KEEPS QUIET by Atilola Samuel

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virtue“astonishingly, on a more keen observation of their perpetually smiling and giggling faces, I realized they were girls of the notorious Fulani tribe…”

There are times when the wafting warmth that causes our sublime heart to momentarily melt into a free-flowing fluid of guileless essence, that characterizes romantic feelings, is not the virtue of beauty but the beauty of virtue. There are times when virtue makes a woman appear more lovely and beautiful than she really is. For a truth, virtue is superior to beauty because it has a greater life span and it’s indestructible by the timeless elements of time and nature. No wonder some men, by the sheer force of the subtle superiority of virtue, have found themselves blossoming in the noiseless bosom of women who, although are not gifted with physical beauty, are blessed with the sufficient dose of this aromatic in Continue reading WHEN VIRTUE SPEAKS BEAUTY KEEPS QUIET by Atilola Samuel →

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OAU with suspected Ebola infection

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oauIteoluwakiisi was taken to the Obafemi Awolowo University Health Centre in the morning of Tuesday, 9/9/2014 for a medical ritual (to weigh him and record his developmental progress). We were turned back by the obvious absence of the usual smiling-faced nurses that held postnatal clinics every tuesday. A man, who seemed surprised to see us, stopped momentarily beside us, then moves on with his fumigation exercise. 

The whole place was smelling of fumigant. We turned back before anyone had the chance to turn us back. A little Continue reading OAU with suspected Ebola infection →

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 #PAUSIBILITY:  HOPEFUL MIRAGE by Adebayo Coker

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TwImg-20140827-121643Last week, I asked that a good Nollywood producer contact me so that I give him/her a nice script that could make a blockbuster but none came forth.  Today, I want to display a bit of what I have in stock.

My dear reader, (peradventure you are campaigner of #30PercentOrNothing), I am not being tendentious or quaint here, but I will like us to learn as we read this didactic story. Let me add, it is only for discerning minds.

Nikangan became a widow as a result of one of those Kirakita wars that hit the village of Kagbepo. Her nephew, Ohunnikanloku also became an orphan. Nikangan lost everything but was able to escape, being consumed by the Continue reading  #PAUSIBILITY:  HOPEFUL MIRAGE by Adebayo Coker →

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WE SLEEP TOO MUCH DOT NG by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi

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 sleeppA few enfant terribles can successfully disturb the peaceful sleep of a majority of docile individuals. When such enfant terribles include persons such as the legendary Fela Anikulapo Kuti, champions of #BringBackOurGirls, Gani Fawehinmi, Japhet Omojuwa and a host of their likes, who have always disturbed the peaceful sleep of docile others, it is interesting to note how these persons are quickly tagged negatively, limbs thrown out almost hitting their faces and then, the precious slumber is resumed without a thought to what these ‘enfant terribles’ are calling our attention to.

If at all Nigerians are moved to fight what has become obvious to be injustice, corruption and so on, if at all, they quickly reconcile with their inner peace, “Who cares?”, “Will the fight or protest put food on my table?”, quickly, like a mother holds a cane at the back of your yansh, they resume the slumber, the “suffering and smiling”, the “no-break-no-jam-on-the-streets-of-Lagos-and-now-elsewhere”. Continue reading WE SLEEP TOO MUCH DOT NG by ‘Lakunle Jaiyesimi →

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 #PAUSIBILITY:  PLAUSIBLE ALIBIS by Adebayo Coker

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images (1)I must quickly let you know that I have not had a good sleep for several days now, so if I don’t deliver as expected in this particular column, I hope you will understand  and still give me kudos for a job well done.

The foregoing typifies the mentality of the political leadership in this clime of ours and the saying, To whom much is given much is expected, is only operational as an idiomaticness that it is.

Tactical Maneuvering is the new one that we woke up to on Monday, when about 500 of our soldiers suddenly lost their geography sense and erroneously found themselves in the interior of Cameroon. The Defence Headquarters  had informed us that  the troops had gone for a regrouping. Yeparipa! Continue reading  #PAUSIBILITY:  PLAUSIBLE ALIBIS by Adebayo Coker →