Category Archives: notMYwords

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#PAUSIBILTY: The Malfeasance of Joey The Donkey, As The King Of The Jungle by Adebayo Coker

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GEJI want to tell a story and I pray you follow me.

Joey is a donkey, strong but only amiably useful in the transport of man and goods from one point to the other, even to the present day. Each time other strong members of the jungle go on expedition, they ride Joey and leave him at the entrance of their rendezvous. Joey will be left alone to graze about but must surely come back on time to convey the strong men back to their various destinations. Very unfair you will say.

One day , just  as another meeting was being hel Continue reading #PAUSIBILTY: The Malfeasance of Joey The Donkey, As The King Of The Jungle by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: ADULATION FOR THAT LAGOS BOY by Adebayo Coker

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fashola1Let me start by wishing you a Happy New Year. Many things in your life will be turned around for good and you will record greater achievements this year; albeit you have to make the right decisions.

I had wanted to drop this piece last week but felt it would be more appropriate for the start of a new year.

I had looked through the stream of politicians we have around here and decided to celebrate just one that has a semblance of Santa Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: ADULATION FOR THAT LAGOS BOY by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: The Gravitas Of These Tickets by Adebayo Coker

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xtianmuslimI have not been disturbed, in anyway  and at anytime, by the religiousity of anyone in arriving at my conclusion. Your Christianity or Islam, better still, your religious belief is not my problem in as much as you are saddled with a responsibility and you deliver expressly, my unreserved ovation will go to you.

Now that we have Christian-Muslim Ticket on one hand and Muslim-Christian Ticket on the other, where do we go from here?  Now that the so much touting of religious hegemony has been removed on both sides of the coin by the two dominant parties in our polity, I ask you again, Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: The Gravitas Of These Tickets by Adebayo Coker →

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A Word From GOD by Ikoro Iyineleda

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The words below were initially placed on the web-site, Nairaland. Because of the evil of the wicked that keep on striving to cut The Truth off out of the land of the living, those words were deleted from Nairaland – and that won’t be the frst time that site has proven either its cowardice, or its affiliation with the evil and the wicked, or both. The words are hereby repeated on this site; that the only preacher of righteousness that appears to be left in this generation of vultures and hyenas may continue to lend his voice to that cause for which he dies, without dying – that yet, behold, both I and mine may live; and for ever.

May they all be so blind that they will not know who to beg from, where to beg in, what to beg with, or how to beg for absolutely anything whatsoever that they may need to receive the forgiveness that will grant them freedom from the bondage of this judgment.

And I give all glory, honour, and adoration to GOD, my God; for it is obvious to all that favour the righteous cause of The Ikoro that my prayer is indeed answered. From being kicked away from the straight and honest knock on the door with an invitation to (on the one hand) ascetism, and the cross of the triangular worker; an invitation to (on the other hand) revelry, and the cross of the triangular worker: to being kicked away from the just as honest, even when not so straight, knock on the door with the loss (for the kick then was just as much of fraud as it has ever been when the ball is kicked by the fool that believes it can dribble a ball) the loss of eighty thousand naira, or more (on the one Continue reading A Word From GOD by Ikoro Iyineleda →

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#PAUSIBILITY: THE FRUIT. THE TREE. THE ORCHARD by Adebayo Coker

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goodluck_buhari_1I must start by tendering my unreserved apology to my followers for not being able to deliver last week. I had a certain deadline that hung to my mind like a vagitus of my son, I had to attend to it.

Our political climate is becoming more and more interesting as our relative ‘peace’ is further threatened by so much perforation of the societal layers by the fetid release of political gases that will evaporate In no time. So I will implore you, not to be carried away.

The primaries are done with results of the clinging of party tickets by tyros and the re-emergence of the old order. Then we will be graduating to the ‘secondary’ come February 2015,  and eventually  matriculated into the ‘tertiary’ starting 29th May, 2015 all through till 2019 before we can reasonably convoke,  successfully or otherwise depends on the choice we make. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: THE FRUIT. THE TREE. THE ORCHARD by Adebayo Coker →

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THE WAY OF THE WOMAN by Ikoro Iyineleda

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woman“I’ll stay with your Daddy until he’s all dead.”

How very amusing. Why not, “until I’m all dead.” And the foolish gender continues to burn itself out into extinction; warring against itself for the more cunning, who is instantly ready to take its place the second it is “all dead” – be it as she whose name and bio-data was immediately removed from the web, when I wanted to ascertain that which I knew of her (removed by such as those who continue to delude themselves with the “E too late” maxim by which they rob the emasculated of a life) she who became one of the five richest human beings on earth upon her husband’s death – for he willed all he had to her; be it as she that Continue reading THE WAY OF THE WOMAN by Ikoro Iyineleda →

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#PAUSIBILITY: We Must Scale This Fence by Adebayo Coker

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NasssI was not able to watch the clip of the jumping legislators till last week Sunday. Remember I told you I didn’t want anyone to put sand in the garri I was enjoying at Ake Arts and Books Festival (AABF).

By the way, for some of us that are complaining about the dearth of the reading culture and literary life in Nigeria, we should endeavor to revive it by organizing, promoting and attending literary events like AABF, LABAF and the likes. I must commend the good work done by Lola Shoneyin and her team on the smooth organization of AABF. Kudos!

Back to where we were. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: We Must Scale This Fence by Adebayo Coker →

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Re: Pausibility: Of Nominal, Normal And The Extreme by Adebayo Coker by Ikoro Iyineleda

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The following is a rejoinder to one of the #PAUSIBILITY articles titled, “#Pausibility: Of Nominal, Normal And The Extreme”.

 

I hope that which you wrote about the mechanic, Adebayo, will be an

eye-opener to the folly set in many high places; of whom Solomon wrote
– and due to whom slaves ride on horses; whilst the rich sit in a low
place, whilst princes walk on foot like slaves. You ever see the fools
blaring their empty-headed skulls through the mass media, thumping
their primitive chests over the “masses” that they would they be voted
into office to serve – not having studied history well enough to
realise that the proletariat not only ever envy the elite, but ever
would they overthrow that very same elite that (as the most foolish
that can be) would it serve them.

I wrote the beginnings of a brief homily once; with which I sought to
explain how even Jesus The Christ was blind to the cunningly conceived
plots of this poorer class that the folly set in many high places
often regale, when addressing them as “the masses.” That homily was Continue reading Re: Pausibility: Of Nominal, Normal And The Extreme by Adebayo Coker by Ikoro Iyineleda →

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#Pausibility: Asceticism vs Epicureanism by Adebayo Coker

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austerityEarlier this week, our polymath Prime Minister, who had on many occasions ‘rebased ‘our minds that our  economy is standing gidigba, finally announced that we should expect  some measure of imposition on our ‘normal’ life as a nation.

I can’t imagine a Nigeria where a minister can’t ride a three-million-dollar car; a Nigeria where a Director in a government parastatal  can’t own properties estimated at billions of naira; a Nigeria where gross ingratiation at the expense of the masses and massive corruption can’t be attenuated to mere pilfering… that will be an abnormal Nigeria.

They brazen- show feigned statistics that are far from the realities of the living conditions of the masses. God knows how they come about those figures. How can an outsider tell you the interior of your house better than you know it yourself? The fish in my pot I know so well. So I need no Fitch to tell me what I know. Victoria’s secret is in public glare. Continue reading #Pausibility: Asceticism vs Epicureanism by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: OF NOMINAL, NORMAL AND THE EXTREME by Adebayo Coker

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Adebayo Coker on Rubbin' Minds
Adebayo Coker on Rubbin’ Minds

Just as the common example, Ramadan has come to an end and a sharp upsurge in the patronage of brothels and beer parlors noticeable. Do not get me wrong, same could be said of quadragesimal period. A great number of us display piety louder than the Pope and the chiefest of Sheikhs just around those periods that we observe our religious abstinence, but other than those times, we are just as evil as the devil can be.

Yours truly was Ebuka’s guest at Channels TV last Sunday. It was a live cast of the famous programme for youths, Rubbin’Minds (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJmy8Q_xx2Q), Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: OF NOMINAL, NORMAL AND THE EXTREME by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: Your Daily Bomb-o-scope, Don’t Go Out Without It by Adebayo Coker

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shekauThe life of a Nigerian is not worth more than a pawn on a chess board; that is to say, nothing is too big for the Nigerian politician to sacrifice: as long as it is not his/her ambition, he/she is okay by it. Nigeria is going down, locally and internationally. There is no denying it. We need help.

The blood-esurient Shekau showed up in a movie again last weekend, even after he was touted to have been killed many times during different military bombardments and raids of his hideouts; the Nigerian government has made this guy ‘a cat with nine lives’ exemplar. True to what he was quoted to have said in the video on Yahoo News, my heart grieved. My heart grieved because on two different occasions have I woken up from a nightmare that my beloved Nigeria is being overtaken by terrorists. The thought of being ruled by some sickened individuals makes me sick. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: Your Daily Bomb-o-scope, Don’t Go Out Without It by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: EXCUSE ME! THIS IS A SECULAR STATE by Adebayo Coker

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Fashola-360x225My good friend and brother, Jeff Underwood asked me earlier in the week if I’m considering posting any other thing on my blog apart from politics. It’s a good question as I have asked myself the same over and again; in fact, I attempted being apolitical on my blog sometime back but to tell you the truth, there is no way one would demand change in this clime without being political, a passivist or Dokubo-like, especially with the rodents that parade themselves as leaders because people with good brains lack the will to offer themselves for service. We must start considering our stance. Enough said.

The Government of the Federation or of a State shall not adopt any religion as State Religion.

Section 10 of the 1999 Constitution of The Federal Republic of Nigeria.

The motto of the Federal Republic of Nigeria shall be Unity and Faith, Peace and Progress. Accordingly, national integration shall be actively encouraged, whilst discrimination on the grounds of place of origin, sex, religion, status, ethnic or linguistic association or ties shall be prohibited. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: EXCUSE ME! THIS IS A SECULAR STATE by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: ARMITICE WITH AN EYE CYST? by Adebayo Coker

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bokoOne of the news items, in fact, it was reeled as a Breaking News item, last weekend was the Ceasefire Deal that was entered into by the FGN with Boko Haram. I am sure so many of us will say it is a welcome development; but immediately I saw that piece on Channels TV I knew this is another of those displays of mental incapacity to think right and to act right by the crop of managers in charge of our state affairs.

I am sure many of us must have been reading different analyses and commentaries on why this particular ceasefire is defective. I have my wholesome reservations too about the deal but I will only employ Maieutics to drive home my point. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: ARMITICE WITH AN EYE CYST? by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: EKITI, A GLIMPSE OF MORE KITI KITI TO COME by Adebayo Coker

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Fayose-and-FayemiI am one of those that never abused or cursed the people of Ekiti on the choice of the Governor they elected in the last gubernatorial election of the state. In fact, I stopped talking about Ekiti politics the moment the result of the said gubernatorial election was announced; I even congratulated and wished the Governor-elect God’s guidance in his new ‘adventure’. But never for once in my private discussions with my Ekiti friends (I have them handful) did I stop letting them know that though JKF lacks the kind of ‘were-lafi-nsoko-were’ kind of skill to survive our typical Nigerian political terrain, it is a grave mistake on the part of the Ekiti electorate to have elected that lairy young man as their Governor. This is the first time I am coming public Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: EKITI, A GLIMPSE OF MORE KITI KITI TO COME by Adebayo Coker →

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GEJ: THIS PASTOR NEEDS A PRIVATE JET by Monsieur Mobutu

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PRIVATE-JETS-IN-NIGERIA‘”Go ye therefore into the world and teach my gospel,” that kinda thing was what the Lord told us and the disciples. Going to all corners of the world, you’ll agree with me sir, has become difficult without a private jet especially for us Pastors. That is the reason I’m addressing this love letter to you (note sir, not to your office as President of the country sir).

Please, kindly disregard the advent and roles played by the ubiquitous social media in connecting anyone with the rest of the world from the recesses of his/her room. In fact, the social media rather extends the reach of Pastors, hence more work need to be done. In the fulfillment of our mandate as Pastors, there’s the need to get physical (You know what I mean not sensually and if your thought is sensual, then you may need my pastoral intervention) with the members of the globe who might have been ‘blessed’ by our messages on the social media or cable televisions across board. Continue reading GEJ: THIS PASTOR NEEDS A PRIVATE JET by Monsieur Mobutu →

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#PAUSIBILITY: PROLIFERATION OF NONSENSE by Adebayo Coker

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I have not been too frequent on social media lately as I have been going through a self- prescribed curative therapy, aimed at purging myself of ‘textiety’, as I was fondly glued to the internet mainly through my phones; but here I am well drowned in a deluge of messages that have flooded my handles, some of which are soliciting my opinion on some national issues; but before I settle down to that, let me digress a bit.

I had thought it is only in Nollywood that we witness watery rushes of a lazy coloration of our common sense, until last weekend when I came in contact with a certain man, whose introduction threw me into crestfallenness, followed by resounding laughter. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: PROLIFERATION OF NONSENSE by Adebayo Coker →

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#PAUSIBILITY: PARABLE OF THE CRUCIFIX by Adebayo Coker

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crucifixDear compatriots, let me wish you a Happy Independence Anniversary all the same, even though I have never had a more watery Independence Anniversary celebration in my existence as a Nigerian. I would not want to be disinterested in this nation and her politics, as I have come to find out that that is exactly the goal of these political louts that call themselves Nigerian politicians. They are perpetuating a psychological disenfranchisement where the enlightened ones amongst us will develop apathy to politics due to the mishandling of the nation and eventually leave the country, so that the politicians will have a leeway to act indiscriminately without any check. But I have promised myself not to dance to their evil drumbeats, and I urge you to join me by registering, participating, and voting right in the next elections, not forgetting to protect your votes. Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: PARABLE OF THE CRUCIFIX by Adebayo Coker →

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DEAR NIGERIANS, IT IS TIME TO ACT by Yemi Czar

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Nigeria-RevolutionIt is with much sadness, I believe, that we have, together, watched our country inexorably degenerate into a total fiasco in the over 60 years of its independence. What is more painful and disheartening is the fact that our crops of politicians are those who have not learnt any notable lessons from the country’s past or the current events around the world nor get moved by the tears and agonies of the oppressed Nigerian souls who constitute the majority of the entire Nigerian population. Perhaps, they either don’t read what the papers and social media reveal each day about their misconducts (I want to believe) or they read them aloof while we read a posteriori, or they are just too busy looting every aspect of our economy with the very worst form of predilection for pilfering that they’ve become so deaf to and unmoved by the cries of the oppressed, and thus fail to call to mind the realities of history and current times. Continue reading DEAR NIGERIANS, IT IS TIME TO ACT by Yemi Czar →

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LADIES: WHERE THE POWER LIES by Monsieur Mobutu

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pottates

The place of women is in the kitchen.

The world is confused. While the men have become weaklings, many content with waking up to bottles of drinks; the women have realized that there’s a power beyond them, or that has been hidden from them for so long, and they are doing all they can to reach for it. Everytime and everywhere, you hear about women emancipation, gender equity and in fact ‘women first’. However, when a snake appears, the men must go first.

When the robbers bang at the door, the men must take the lead. And foolishly, many men would always say ‘YES’ to whatever the women say, however confused they may perpetually be even at their own detriment.

Continue reading LADIES: WHERE THE POWER LIES by Monsieur Mobutu →

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#PAUSIBILITY: WE ALL ARE CRAZY by Adebayo Coker

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lastma bribe lagosI had thought to relax my nerves for this week, especially when it is ominous if I don’t.

Still in shock after the auto crash that almost took my life on Wednesday night. At about 9pm, right in front of the Women Development Centre (WDC), along Oba Ogunji road, Agege Lagos , a Keke NAPEP tricyclist rode against the traffic and gave me a hard head butt. The car crashed and I sustained a cut on my toe, but I thank God for life.

Yesterday, I boarded a tricycle to Fagba as that is the closest point I could get to use the ATM, the mod con that emits money anytime of the day (if its operations have not gone on frenzy). One would have thought that in a  bid to Continue reading #PAUSIBILITY: WE ALL ARE CRAZY by Adebayo Coker →